Nothing is foolproof to a sufficiently talented fool.

Sunday, April 23, 2006

The Monarchs Fan in its Natural Habitat

In the spirit of friendship and understanding among the hockey fans in Hartford (Ct.) and Manchester (N.H.) during the current playoff series between the two cities, I present the following composite of the Manchester Monarchs fan.

I hope you have a big trunk, cuz I'm gonna put my bike in it

Monarchs fans are extrememly sensitive. Do not taunt them, or try to feed them cotton candy, lest they claw at you with their hideously-deformed paws.

I have exorcised the demons… this house is clear

In Manchester, diversity is a way of life. Look, Merle! I bet she's not from around here!

I'm not gay, I'm just celibate

Sometimes, Monarchs fans even forget the name of their own team. Hey, guys, look behind you: M-O-N-A-R-C-H-S

If the lieutenant is indeed a woman as she claims to be then she is suffering from the worst case of hemorrhoids I have ever seen!

The Monarchs are lucky, in that their mascot is not a costume at all, but a real, live, local New Hampshire woman. And, best of all, guys: she's single!

Holy testicle Tuesday

Every night is "Mullet Night" in Manchester.

4 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Wow, a picture of John Tripp! I'd almost forgotten about him.

If the Monarchs fans had a blog they'd call it "Can't Stop the Whining."

4/24/06, 9:44 AM

 
Blogger Brushback said...

"Can't Stop The Bleating" (heh, heh, heh).

Not that the real CSTB would have anything to do with such a dysfunctional crowd, of course.

4/24/06, 4:18 PM

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

You people are so dumb. You should be ashamed to call yourselves hockey fans. You're not in it for the game you're in it to be assholes.

5/3/06, 6:01 PM

 
Blogger Brushback said...

Monarchs fans are extrememly sensitive

Well, at least I didn't lie about this one point.

Sorry you had to get your panties all in a bunch, but this was all a spoof, born out of some playoffs-driven intensity (check around the Web-- this type of goofing around is a fairly common sight at this time of year).

I don't actually harbor any serious ill will towards Manchester fans, and in fact, I know quite a number of them by face and name.

5/4/06, 1:51 PM

 

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