Nothing is foolproof to a sufficiently talented fool.

Wednesday, June 07, 2006

Nazarov Smells Blood

My hair has a mind of its own. For instance, the other day it went bowling without me
Andrei Nazarov (62) vs. old hippie Bob Probert

Here's what Andrei Nazarov, who never seems at a loss for a quote, had to say to Sport Express about Monday night's Game One of the Stanley Cup Finals, which saw Dwayne Roloson being lost to Edmonton because of an injury suffered in a collision with Carolina's Andrew Ladd:

"It's debatable whether Ladd intentionally or unintentionally crashed into Roloson the way that he did, or if Ladd could've lowered his center of gravity and softened his impact with Roloson-- who, by the way, is a very pleasant and friendly fellow, with whom I began the season in Minnesota.

"Game Two of the series will be played straight-up, I assume. But if Edmonton loses again, then in the third game, they will have the Carolina players in their sights-- most of all, Ladd.

"Georges Laraque, in my opinion, is the toughest enforcer in the NHL. Possibly he tries to take Ladd out, or perhaps more directly, they target Carolina's goaltender.

Satire is tragedy plus time
Recipe for Disaster: Ty Conklin in for Roloson

"Laraque has no equal in close combat. He has the ideal fighter's size and balance, and can do damage with both hands, especially the left. I've heard that his parents are from Jamaica, and among his ancestors were pirates from that region. It would seem that he is an innate warrior.

"My advice to Carolina: first, do not dress Ladd for Game Three. Second, keep your back-up goaltender ready..."

I'm not sure if any of Nazarov's statements can hold water, but I think they're amusing to read nonetheless.