Nothing is foolproof to a sufficiently talented fool.

Sunday, July 30, 2006

How Do You Explain Sweden?

I will try to be more tolerant of lactose
If I only had a brain...

All of these photos are from the Swedish Elitserien, taken from the photo gallery on the Timrå IK web site.

The title of this post refers to a quote from that great Canadian, Don Cherry, who said, "When the Martians finally land here from outer space, how are we going to explain Sweden to them?" (Actually, I just made that up.)

I go to Subway, and I leave Subway card at home, every time! All I want is a free sandwich!
The windup...

Helping others is what John Stamos is all about
...and here's the pitch!

Do you guys sell Elmer's Glue and thumbtacks? We're trying to put together a Tilt-A-Whirl
Coach said if we give up one more powerplay goal this year, he's gonna trade us all to the Islanders

Dammit! I haven't been to the Olive Garden in, like, forever!
Whoops-- sorry about that

That is a good question, scary androgenous white guy, and I would like to reply by taking my shirt off
..Can't...breathe...

Aren't you a little out of place here? And everywhere else on Earth?
Does this read "Kick Me" in Swedish?

To your right, a flattened squirrel. Straight ahead, the future!
Miikka Kiprusoff: "Which way is Calgary?"

Careful with that nail gun, Jesus Christo
A stick under the visor-- now, who could be responsible?...

Your secret army of cloned historical figures is maturing according to schedule
...aha! The villain!*

Unacceptable?! Did you see the pool? They FLIPPED the bitch!
Man, your skates reek!

The answer was C, you fuckwad
Let me guess-- either you got hit in the nuts with a puck, or that's your resume for being the Islanders' GM?

 I stopped to wipe out a village of farmers
Anyone for Twister?

Today I've made a decision based on very poor information: I'm going to be a trucker
In Sweden, they seem to be really big on huge signs.

They're big believers in the concept of voluntary simplicity
I mean REEEALLLY big on huge signs.

Here you were, perfectly capable of alienating people on personality alone

Darn. And it came so close to turning out semi-decent

If you could be really, really quiet, that would be great


*Note: That's not actually Forsberg's stick blade underneath the guy's visor. Also note that Sidearm Delivery doesn't subscribe to the theory that all Swedes are evil, and that Peter Forsberg is the Devil. However, we do subscribe to the theory that anyone who plays for the Flyers is a complete doofus.

5 Comments:

Blogger gsdgsd13 said...

I really want to know the message behind the Lois Lane sign. I mean, I don't want to know enough that I'd actually do some research, but almost that much.

I also want to know what prompted the "Godfather" graphic on the previous sign -- or maybe Swedes are just big Chorus of Disapproval fans.

7/30/06, 7:32 PM

 
Anonymous alanah said...

Swedes are certainly not all evil. However Forsberg might actually be the Devil. Something to keep in mind, Brushback.

I also want to know what the Lois Lane sign says. These people went to a lot of trouble and it just might be awesome... :)

7/31/06, 3:10 AM

 
Blogger Ingmar "W" Bergman said...

It says:

"What would Superman be without it's Lois Lane? Thank's for everything Valeri, we'll never forget you."

It's from Valeri Krykovs last game.

7/31/06, 5:43 AM

 
Blogger Brushback said...

Thanks, Ingmar, for that translation-- awesome job!

I guess the sign is saying that Valeri Krykov is Lois Lane, then. So now, the question becomes, who's Superman-- Kent Manderville?

:)

7/31/06, 12:34 PM

 
Blogger dr-nix said...

Valeri Krykov was called superman because he hadn't missed a game in like 11 years or something (i forget the specifics)

The Godfather thingie was a tribute to the previous coach Kenta Johansson who made a name for himself in the club (coached his new club HV71 to win the league last season).

The two huge overheadflags (or whatever they are called) are:

The nr 20 Zetterberg (the text says Return of the King) and the picture is from the first homegame during the lockoutseason where Zetterberg returned to Timra IK.

The Nr21 is also during the lockout-season, during a game against MoDo that "flag" was displayed. Basicly it's just a joke saying that we have the best nr21 Mats Hansson (a homegrown defender that now plays in Allsvenskan i belive) not MoDo (who obviously had Peter Forsberg as their 21)

6/12/08, 12:17 PM

 

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